Farewell, My Familiar-A Song for Ritual

Crow Magic was my first foray into recording with the Crow Women. Imagine my elation when our most prolific and arguably most talented songwriter Alane Crowomyn asked me to sing a lead on one of her songs. If only because of that, Farewell, My Familiar holds a special place in my heart. But it isn’t the only reason.

Here it it. Perhaps you would like to listen while you read.

Farewell, My Familiar is one of the Crow Women’s rite of passage songs. It honors the passing of our most special of animal friends to the Summerland. We all know the heartache when an animal companion leaves us. We know it’s coming; chances are high that we will outlive our pets. Still, when the time comes, no matter how prepared we think we are, it’s a huge stab in the gut.

But a familiar isn’t a pet. I mean, yes, it often is a pet, but it isn’t just a pet. A familiar is a magical spirit in the guise of an animal. A familiar supports your magic, gives you energy, teaches you about the magical being within yourself. You know a familiar when you see one. (When one starts writing blogs for a pagan music website, it’s a pretty good clue.)

Thus losing a familiar can be more traumatic than losing a mundane pet. It’s a major impact on your spiritual and emotional life. As pagans, ritual is a tool for us to honor these life transitions. Farewell, My Familiar can support that ritual.

In 2011, we were rehearsing all our pieces for Crow Magic, including Farewell, My Familiar. Though the subject matter is heart-wrenching, in practice I was easily able to keep my composure. The song was clearly written with a cat in mind (“cuddle in my lap and purr”), and I am not a cat person. (I’m allergic—nothing against them as perfectly legitimate creatures of the goddess.) Even when we performed it at a Sacred Music Festival and my dad teared up, I managed to keep it together, although just the sight of my father’s eyes turning red can turn me to a sobbing mess.

Then Ffaff died.

We’d had rabbits before, and they aren’t exactly known for being long-lived critters. But Ffaff and Tita were the first pair we had. They were litter-mates and partners and the best little companions on the planet. Of the two, Tita (the doe) was probably more of a familiar, but Ffaff (her brother) was the sweetest little guy who gave the softest bunny kisses. He died suddenly after a short illness, and we were crushed.

We had just recorded Farewell, My Familiar. So, when we buried Ffaff under the apple tree, my husband suggested I sing Farewell, My Familiar in his honor. It was a disaster. “O-oh my…” Sob, sob, snort… “friend…” Sob, snort, sniffle… “end….”

Thank goddess a few years later when Tita died the CD had long since been released, and I could play the song instead of blubbering through it. I can attest to the song’s use in a familiar’s memorial, but it also works well at Samhain if you honor your mighty furry, feathered or finned familiars during your Samhain ritual.

Song brings a depth of emotion to ritual that no other tool can do. Which is why you should never plan to sing at your own familiar’s memorial. That’s why you have your friends the Crow Women to do it for you. Get Crow Magic and let us support your ritual with Farewell, My Familiar or one of many other wonderful songs on our three albums created for you and your pagan magick.

Today’s featured image (above at top) is Murphy, the canine familiar to Deb Kroehwimwin.

For more information about the Crow Women pagan choir, and access to all the blog posts by Tara and the other 9 crowsingers who have written for Pagan Song, you can visit the Crow Women author page here on Pagan Song.

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